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No, We Don’t Need Fake Meat.

So the other day I was having a conversation with a friend of mine about the medical business/field.* He stressed the point that modern medicine isn’t focused on prevention but instead it focused on cures. Prevention of illness is an amazing thing. It puts one ahead of the curve when it comes to impending disease and medical conditions and let’s be honest, when your dealing with your health time is a key factor. Cures on the other hand can also mean increased profits for hospitals and drug companies.

This post isn’t about that. This post is about the misallocation of research and time. I seldom read my local newspaper the Post and Courier but today I flipped through the local section and came across a story with the headline “MUSC, ‘meat doc’ split: Neither party bears any ‘ill will’ toward the other, University statement says”.

I thought to myself “meat doc”?

As I read further into the actual story a doctor at the Medical University of South Carolina (MUSC) named Vladimir Mironov has been working with experiments that would facilitate the growth of meat in laboratories.** His goals are to alleviate future food crises with synthetic meat but MUSC “let him go” for undisclosed reasons.*** Dr. Mironov’s intentions seem noble but of course the FDA is gave him the Heisman when he asked for funding for research because this is some borderline Soylent Green/SkyNet type ish.**** (He is also backed by PETA, so that automatically makes me give him the stink eye.) Honestly, it’s just creepy but that leads me to my main question:

Why not skip all of the weird science and focus on curing cancer, sickle cell, HIV/AIDS, or heart disease? *****

Yes, there are major food issues around the world but the first world could get off of it’s a** and do something about this. (Sometimes these famines are caused by governments who are in charge of specific people, like North Korea, simply because they don’t give a damn so Uncle Sam and the rest of the Justice League can’t step in…although they should.) Medical science shouldn’t be wasted on man-made meat. The various types of cancers and other illnesses are to prevalent not to cure. I realize this guy’s idea did not receive any funding from the FDA but I wish research like this would get table so that some real progress could be made.****** Like I said, I’m no scientist but tell me if I’m off base. There are too many sick people out there for ideas like fake meat to even be thought of as a priority. Stop cancer or sickle-cell then I might consider fake meat.

Vaya con Dios.

*Face it, it is a business.

**He jumps in it!

***Are bulls not giving heifers the eye in cow pastures around the world anymore? Are all the bulls on the DL or something?

****I’m no scientist. Hell, I sucked at science in school but I harbor a theory that screwing with the food sources that we currently have has put us in some deep kimchi already. Over developed kids, steroids, and many of these other conditions can’t be random.

*****This is a little personal to me so forgive my rancor.

******Or what I call “real progress” anyway.

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17 responses to “No, We Don’t Need Fake Meat.

  1. I guess I’ll play Devil’s advocate. Disease research, especially clinical research related to cancer and HIV, gets a sh*t-ton of money and while research in these areas is of the highest importance, we can’t allocate all research funds to them alone. There are other areas that also need funding that may not have as large of an impact as curing cancer, but that can’t be ignored.

    There’s also the fact that these diseases are damn hard to cure. It isn’t that we aren’t working hard enough to cure them, but even with all the money we pour into it, we’re limited by our technology & knowledge (& scientific politics). Eventually, we’ll get to where our resources can combat these diseases and get rid of them. Well, that’s if the pharmaceutical industry doesn’t get in the way. After all, you make a lot more money treating patients than curing them.

    • Yeah, I know TDA that diseases are a pain in the arse to cure and the “big” diseases probably get a sh*t ton of money for research but when I read the article it just seemed kind of silly. I also wrote this post in ten minutes with a ton of emotion that was channeled through the mind of a non-science guy whose family is dealing and has dealt with cancer twice since May.

      As for the business side of things, you echoed the same thing that my man, the RN said because people have profit margins to maintain.

  2. I’m never giving up meat (pause). For as long as men have lived on this Earth, we been eating animals. We’ve made it this far, I see no reason to switch over to this comparatively new and untested non-meat. I’m good. Matter fact, I’m bout to go have some bacon right now!

  3. Prevention is something that we will always have to keep on the burner. I think the shift to preventative measures probably stemmed from the inability to come up with cures in a “reasonable” time frame. So what can you do if you can’t cure??..prevent. We need to prevent or cure before it is ultimately too late. And this could be what the Dr. Is trying to do. Or he could be in a race among colleagues to discover the next big thing…who knows. It is scary because we already see that something ain’t right in the water… are they trying to cure or prevent that even though we don’t know what THAT is? Oh, side note….PETA is gonna get a.

    • I agree Dr. Vlad maybe pioneering something great or he could just be in it for the press. I still don’t want fake pork chops. I’ve spent too many hours chasing hogs for that.

      I don’t know if PETA will start that big of a fracas but they are as about as subtle as a piece of gravel in your shoe. They failed to keep Mike Vick out of the NFL, had adds with models pretty much stirring the trough with veggies, and now Waka Flacka is nude in one of their ads… they are just a fringe movement who cater to liberal lunatics.

  4. PETA is going to start the next civil war… I had to finish my comment.

  5. ….now I am giggling.. FAKE MEAT… haha.

  6. *sigh* a few things….

    1.) im disappointed this wasnt an open letter to Taco Bell. i had a completely different idea about what this post was about based on the title. BOO!

    2.) dont get it twisted, there is a good portion of the funds going to PREVENTATIVE research. hell, my lab benefits from NIH R01 grants that are geared towards it. while there is still money going to “cures” and “treatments” a good portion of federal $$ do in fact going to basic science research (just knowing how sh*t works in general) and preventative medicine research (how does sh*t dysfunction and how can we stop it).

    3.) to piggyback off TDA’s point, not ALL research $$ can go to biomedical sciences. we need scientific research funded in ALL areas–defense, safe (and in this case “alternative”) food, clean water, etc. that said, i though we already had fake meat i.e. soy/tofu?? *shrugs* nothing will really replace REAL meat in most capitalistic, industrialized countries, but it damn sure will help TDA’s family back in the Mother Land. #winninghere #winningthere

    4.) research $$ is getting SLASHED by the federal govt. the POTUS proposed budget will cut NIH and NSF funding by about $1B i believe. so not only will there be less $$ for the f*ck a$s fake meat, there will be less $$ for quality research all around. *smdh* damn shame. medicinal prevention, education–no one really cares if either of these are negatively impacted. screw your health, screw your educational goals. its the way of the world (and by “world” i mean america–other countries are definitely winning in those areas)

    5.) im still pissed this isnt about TACO BELL!!!! dammit! #thatisall

    • 1) I don’t think about Taco Bell that much. I’m still not sure why everyone was shocked about Taco Bell’s meat. (pause) If you are awake at 2 and are settling for the Fourth Meal then eating fake meat is probably one of several questionable things you’ve done that day. *Sidenote* Taco Bell is selling shrimp now…

      2,3.) I’m just angry okay. I know there is a ton of good medical research that is being undertaken out there but fake meat needs to be funded by evil conglomerates, Glenn Beck, and not the Feds. Did you just fire shots at TDA’s family?

      4.) Agreed the evil conglomerate types have lobbyists. John Q. Public doesn’t. (Oh wait a minute we do have lobbyists. They’re called the Senate and the House, but the take scrilla from the evil lobbyists… Scheiße!!!

  7. NubianEmpress

    why all the hate on man-meat? LOL i kid. fake meat seems gross, so i cosign with Wu %120.

    • “why all the hate on man-meat?” (Pause, Pause, Pause, Pause!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!)

      I’m glad you agree with me but easy on the %120 rhetoric. The last person who agreed with me to that high of a level is doing 30 for some ish that I can’t discuss… Hold you head Man-Man, I’m putting some money on your books tomorrow.

  8. But your meat is already being created in a lab. With the amount of genetic mutation that has been done to our livestock for the sake of bigger meat production is gross, IMO. The cows in the majority of farms, factory farms, are fed all kinds of antibiotics to keep away disease because the conditions they live in are so dirty and nasty. The chickens only live to be about 5-6 weeks before slaughter because any older than that their hearts start giving out, because of all the genetic mutations they’ve undergone to create bigger breast/more meat per bird. The nasty crap we put into our bodies from all this genetically mutated and processed foods is a pretty big contributor to cancer, heart disease. And THIS is what you’d rather eat over laboratory fake meat? Even our soy beans are genetically mutated. There’s no winning, no more ‘natural’.

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