Buick Regal Music

Buick music you b****es.

Rawse! Wu! [Ugh]

It was a steel blue 1982 Buick Regal. (Body by Fisher and what not.) It hated my guts for some reason but alas it was my mode of transportation for about four years until it finally died.

The “It” that I’m referring too is the car that my brother and myself drove in high school as well as what I would drive when I was home in from college back in the day that we inherited from our grandfather. (That Holesy Young was a cool-ass dude, for realz.) It had no air conditioning and toward the end no heat. The gas hand went south and stayed south. The mirror on the passenger side met some ill-gotten fate that I don’t quite remember. The headliner occasionally fell to the ground when the mood struck it. The radio did work well but the tape deck was as broke as a crack head on the second day of the month.

*Snort*

I had a blast in “Blue Thunder” but the few bad times were painful too. I think it lasted until after the summer of 1999. Blue Thunder was a perfectly okay car to drive until that summer. When I came home from another year at the College of Charleston, I got a job working for a company that is or was a division of Maytag building soda machines. The plant was located in a town called Williston, SC which made for a 38 mile trip each way. Blue Thunder took it upon itself to make each of those 76 miles pure d hell for old Wu. (Considering all of this, the Summer of 1999 was the BEST SUMMER EVER!) *If you read that last sentence out loud in the “Pigs in Space voice it’s just hilarious. Trust me*

From the end of May to the beginning of August I had several incidents with that car that can only be described as “trying”. I worked the second shift so I reported to work at 3:30 every day. One sweltering may after noon near the intersection of U.S. 278 and U.S. 3 the tire on the passenger side decided to stop being a tire and start to resemble a scratching post used by  James Howlett , Daken Akihiro, or Laura Kinney . So I pull into a gas station and start to change my tire in the 90 degree heat. This only took about 10 minutes but I was covered in sweat and grime before I even clocked-in for work, where I would inevitably become covered in sweat and grime. (This may have been the only time in my life where I was extra-grimey.)

Then there was a strange mechanical mishap that was minor but inconvenient none-the-less. Some weird bolt came off of the engine one day and made Blue Thunder actually sound like, well Blue Thunder. This is not a good look sound for a car. Luckily my cousin Wesley knew what it was and fixed it. I ended up being about one hour late for work, but who gives a f*** about getting yelled at by your boss when you don’t give a f*** about the job?

Later that summer my paternal grandfather passed away. During that week I worked Monday and Tuesday and took convalescent leave the rest of the week to be will my family. However that Tuesday night when I was getting ready to leave work at 11:30, I walked outside, got into the car, turned the ignition, it made some strange noise, and that was that. I made a phone call to my pops and then waited 45 minutes in the dark to be picked up. *Snort* There was so much going on at the time I honestly don’t remember what the hell was wrong with the damn car I don’t remember it just didn’t work.

There would be two more incidents that summer that would finally make me hate the sh*t out of the car even more. Both would involve the radiator/cooling system that eventually seemed to neither radiate nor cool. One night in Late July when I was driving home the temperature gauge just went nuts so I pulled into a gas station and did the water thing for the car. (Don’t put a race car in the red Jules!) I waited a while for it to cool down then I continued on my way. The next day the thermostat was replaced and I was back in business, or so I thought. Later that week I was doing the same thing, (Diving home from work.) and I hear a loud pop, see steam coming from under the hood, and then the car finally just shuts off. Lucky for me I was actually only a few miles from home. I popped the hood and saw that one of the radiator hoses just exploded. I called got a ride, and the next day the hose was fixed.

The good part in this story this was my next to last week at that job so I didn’t have to drive to and from there every day. Later that year the car was finally put out of its misery. Like I stated, I have many fond memories of Blue Thunder, but the bad ones just make me want to say swear words of the compound variety. (Okay, I’m probably going to say swear words of the compound variety anyway, car or no car. I just like to cuss and sh*t.) Everyone has had bad memories of car issues that just seemed ungodly or satanic. I’m not saying everyone has had a ride with Christine type qualities but you get my point. What are y’all’s? Everybody wasn’t pushing dope cars so I know there have to be some good “I hate that piece of junk” stories floating around out there. There’s nothing like swapping a good story about a bad situation so sound off.

Vaya con Dios.

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2 responses to “Buick Regal Music

  1. That car was pretty much awful!

    • Awful is a word that I would use. I wouldn’t have minded so much if it didn’t die on me in Williston of all places. Williston at 12:30 at night on a hot July night is not the move. However, I was near Fleetwood’s when the radiator hose exploded. . . good times.

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